Once In A WhileMuffled steps in the whitePast half-trees and dim dark shadows;A flash of soft glowing eyes!The growling metal beast startles from its coverThen quickly melts away;The grey path appears beforeFrom nothing, and vanishes behindLike time: The turns, the obstaclesObscure until the present;In passing, a vague memory left behind,Abandoned--Alone and silent in the white
Sinking BeneathI stood still andDescended to a world beneathAnd felted to the tapestry(My own)Where there is no intentionNor method, nor willAnd the constant shifting peopleAre not peopleHusk full of lifeDusty breaths in joyous silenceChittering notes to a slow and changing beatLittle boundless dance around and through meFar below my woven threadsOf tight-spun lives--With and far below
Dystrakshunz"Where is my juice?" from the overtired visiting two-year-old.Clashing metal and repetative battle cries.Cigarette smoke.Popcorn kernels wedged between my teeth.Clicks and whirs of the computer.Two moms complaining about their husbands.Dishes and loudly groaning drawers.Chrrs of static and whiny middle eastern music from the baby moniter.Infant screams of joy.Wrists sore from resting on the edge of the desk."How far have you gotten in the game?" from the person who loaned it to me ten minutes ago.My pounding head, itching eyes, fluttery heartbeat.
KnowBuried in my pastA sacred knowledgeI dont know anythingHell if I knowBut Im so lostI cant even find my own wayWho doesnt wantto know everythingWho doesnt wantto feel like theyre worth somethingWho doesnt wantto be loved without a chainWho doesnt wantto be happyI needSomethingSo badly it hurts but I just dont know what it isI wantTo feelThis emptiness isnt realBut who doesnt wantto know everythingWho doesnt wantto feel like theyre worth somethingWho doesnt wantto be loved without a chainWho doesnt wantto be happyIm so lonely but I dont know who to turn toIm all alone and I dont know what to doI want to know why I cry so hardAnd I want to know why it hurtsWho doesnt wantTo know everythingWho doesnt wantTo feel like theyre worth somethingWho doesnt wantTo be loved without a chainWho doesnt wantTo be happy
Waking MomentI fly across a vast plain of ice and waterAbove me I see the skyMy heart breathes and beating drums it seems to beIm falling through emptinessThen suddenly I see thisThis pitiful world of hunger and despairAnd I wonder if I was really thereAnd I wonder if I was ever thereI see but my eyes dont know anythingI hear but my ears are far awayI find myself in a world of understandingI know what it means to be meThen suddenly I see thisThis pitiful world of hunger and despairAnd I wonder if I was really thereI want to fly awayBut I keep falteringI wait for the moment when I will come awakeFor foreverThen suddenly I see itA wonderful world of knowing who I amAnd I wonder how I could ever sleepI wonder how I could possiblySuddenly I see thisThis pitiful world of hunger and despairAnd I wonder if I was really thereOr was I dreaming?Or am I dreaming...
Heart of GoldTo melt your heart of gold And mold it into my reflectionMaking yours the changeFrom pure to pure darknessSo innocent and small Your bright black eyes I could not resistPatiently I satUntil you came to meThe fire in your heart Is so easy to manipulateWhat smolders for youWill burn so well for meHow quickly you gave in For you do not know your own powersYour spirit is strongYou possess old wisdomYou could break free of me At any time if you only knewI will not allow thatYou must be mine aloneTo melt your heart of gold Will be so simple if you love meI whisper an old verseAnd your heart shall obey
Buried Treasure in your HeartEveryone has thingsThat mean nothing to anyone but themYou know what I meanThat little keychain you found on the sidewalkThat scrap of paperYour baby sister made her first scribble onAnd anyone elseWould wonder why you keep such a thingBut you just smileAnd treasure it always for some reason
The Girl Who Had An OmaOur frozen faces grin from paper houses on the pageThe wind blows damp by the woodpile where I once playedAnd near it the shelter I cut from the brushDissapeared neath all thorny tangled archesThe wood of pine and pear tree mutters endlesslyMy fairy ring cut down with the grasses thereBut she clings still to the tree whose bark is full of faces as the thunder criesHer footprints mark the warm soft soil beneath the pinesWho once wore cobweb dresses and sang to fairies in their branchesWho stirred up potions in puddles on the gravel roadShe sleeps still in the hammock as the sun creeps higherAnd hears the ghost of a wolfs howl by the snow-covered garden
NormalityNormalityAs I passed through the vague routines of morningThrough sleepless dreamsAnd restless yearningsI spied a scarlet ray of sunlightBreaking the detatched normalityAnd for a moment I wished I could beThat daring spark of Sols fireDancing and defying the dull grey sky